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Then the word of Yahweh came to Jeremiah after ... dictation, saying,
The idiom "The word of Yahweh came" is used to introduce a special message from God. See how you translated a similar phrase in Jeremiah 1:4. Alternate translation: "Then Yahweh gave a message to Jeremiah after ... dictation. He said," or "After ... dictation, Yahweh spoke this message to Jeremiah:" (See: rc://en/ta/man/translate/figs-idiom)
to Jeremiah ... Jeremiah's dictation
It is not clear why Jeremiah is referring to himself by name here. You may translate using first person, as the UDB does. (See: rc://en/ta/man/translate/figs-123person)
at Jeremiah's dictation
See how you translated similar words in Jeremiah 36:4.